Library Notes
October 28, 2011
Erika Kosin

Using Books to Talk to Children about Family Illness and Death

 Throughout the month of October the focus has been on Breast Cancer awareness where children of all ages hear the word Cancer and learn to recognize the significance of the color pink, but many are unaware of what cancer is and how it can affect them. In fact, most parents shelter their children from the disease until the day that they need to speak to their children about a loved one who is seriously ill, or even worse, the parent him/herself. There is nothing to truly prepare a parent for this day, but there are books that may help parents talk to their children that deal both with the disease and also the loss of a loved one. While broaching these subjects may be tricky and scary, sometimes letting a child know what to expect can help them process the information and understand that it is not their fault.

Some books available at Rowan Public Library for children about Cancer include:
Mom Has Cancer! by Jennifer Moore-Mallinos – This short picture book explores the fear a child has when he notices something isn’t right as Mom and Dad are always sad and going to the doctor. When Mom explains to her son that she has cancer and what that will mean for the family, the boy is of course scared and sad, but is able to cope with the changes happening in the home. While in the book, mom’s cancer goes into remission, it does tell children that the doctor’s visits won’t stop and that mommy can get sick again, but they should be happy that everything is ok right now.

My Mommy has Cancer by Carolyn Stearns Parkinson – Written by a mother of three who’s youngest was only five when she was diagnosed with cancer, this book is meant to explain cancer to a very young child. The author felt that it was important to let children know that even though mommy is sick and it is a scary, sad time, it is alright for them to be happy and enjoy life.

Nana, What’s Cancer by Beverlye Hyman Fead and Tessa Mae Hamermesh – A book of questions and answers between a 10 year old girl and her grandmother as the girl tries to understand this illness that effects so many people. Factual and informative for children who are either curious about the disease or want to understand what a loved one is going through.

Good Luck, Mrs. K.! by Louise Borden - While family is important to children, they also feel the loss of a teacher when one is seriously ill and can not return to the classroom. Ann loves her third-grade teacher, from her interesting name to the way she knows all of the children in her class. When Ann’s teacher gets sick and a substitute comes in, she is faced with a reality that sometimes illness is not fair. As the class sends their teacher letters in the hospital, the students learn about cancer and see how it can affect those around them.

When Someone Has a Very Serious Illness and When Someone Very Special Dies from the series Children Can Learn to Cope with Loss and Change by Marge Heegaard – Both of these titles are set up in workbook form where parents can make copies of the pages and have children participate in the activities to help them deal with the emotions they are feeling when dealing with a serious illness or the loss of a loved one.