INSPIRING FRIENDSHIPS

by Pam Everhardt Bloom Rowan Public Library

“Fate chooses your relations. You choose your friends.” This quote from Jacques Delille, a French poet and classicist, may aptly describe what we enjoy most about friends - choice. Friendship could be defined as a personal connection with people you like and with whom you share similar interests. What makes long term friendships special?  Do they survive because of similarities or do real friendships thrive with friends that push us out of our comfort zone? The following books explore many aspects of friendship and include selections for all ages.

An Improbable Friendship, the Remarkable Lives of Israeli Ruth Dayan and Palestinian Raymonda Tawil and Their Forty Year Peace Mission by Anthony David is both biography and a story of friendship. As Ruth Dayan, 99 and former wife of the late Israeli military leader and statesman Moshe Dayan and Raymonda Tawil, 76 and mother-in-law to the late Yasser Arafat, Chairman of the Palestine Liberation Organization confirm, “We love each other. Enemies can be friends and friends can be enemies in this country.” After reading the saga of Ruth and Raymonda’s behind-the-scenes friendship, you may nod at the author’s sentiment “that with empathy and common sense, the seemingly insolvable Middle-Eastern conflict can have an end.” Theirs is an amazing story not to be missed.

A Young Adult non-fiction selection, I Will Always Write Back, How One Letter Changed Two Lives by Caitlin Alifirenka and Martin Ganda with Liz Welch is a book appropriate for many ages. This friendship began in September 1997 when Pennsylvania seventh grader Caitlin chose Zimbabwe as her country of choice for a pen pal because it sounded cool. Fourteen year old Martin Ganda received her letter and replied. Their correspondence continued for six more years and they are friends to this day. This dual memoir demonstrates how friendship, love and awareness of others can change our world and may leave you thinking about your place in the world long after finishing the last page.

Another book for older juveniles and young adults, We Beat the Street, How a Friendship Pact Led to Success by Drs. Sampson Davis, George Jenkins, and Rameck Hunt with Sharon M. Draper, tells the true story of three street-tough Newark boys whose friendship was their sustaining guidepost as they become doctors in spite of insurmountable odds. Dr. Rameck Hunt explains how difficult it could be in his community to actually “choose” your friends; “We forged bonds with those who lived around us. We had no other choice…unfortunately…it became the norm to do the wrong thing instead of the right thing.”  And then in tenth grade he met Sampson Davis and George Jenkins and formed a friendship that changed their lives. Today they are cofounders of the Three Doctors Foundation and are still friends. If you enjoy this book, you might also like two more adult oriented books by these authors, The Pact, Three Young Men Make a Promise and Fulfill a Dream and The Bond, Three Young Men Learn to Forgive and Reconnect with Their Fathers.

Friendships happen when we connect. And although we may choose our friends, these wonderful connections may happen in surprising ways. Delve into the following books for more stories of friendship: Adults: The Firebrand and the First Lady: Portrait of a Friendship: Pauli Murray, Eleanor Roosevelt, and the Struggle for Social Justice by Patricia Bell-Scott; So Brave, Young, and Handsome by Leif Enger; Friends for the Journey by Madeleine L’Engle and Luci Shaw. Older Juveniles to Adult:  Born to Bark, My Adventures with an Irrepressible and Unforgettable Dog by Stanley Coren; Wonder by R.J Palacio; Wild Things by Clay Carmichael; Hold Fast by Blue Balliet. Younger children and up: Owen & Mzee, the True Story of a Remarkable Friendship, told by Isabella Hatkoff, Craig Hatkoff and Dr. Paula Kahumbu; Help by Holly Keller; Do Unto Otters by Laurie Keller.